Love that is not Obligation
I wasn’t going to write a Valentine’s day blog. One reason is because everybody else is doing it. Another reason is that I could hear my teen in my head say, “It’s so main stream.” But the writer and lover of truth in me won the battle. My thoughts on love I realize are my thoughts. I can’t change the whole world. I do know more about love and how it behaves. I never said it out loud or came up with a plan about how I would love. But when I learned, love flowed. There were no feelings of obligations. I love because I have something to give. I promise it won’t be mushy. So, here it is: my say on love.
Currently in author news, I’m writing my life story. Thus, I’ve been contemplating love and its meaning a lot lately. I realize that I was not taught love while growing up. I was a victim of obligation. I was clothed, sheltered, and fed. All the while, I found myself trying to make sense of everything that wasn’t happening such that love was often labeled as actions like hugs, encouragement, and appreciation. Not knowing a true definition of love caused me to make some crazy mistakes. Surprisingly, I grew up and realized what love should be. I assure you my quest didn’t stop there. The truth is I had much to learn about love.
Love is not obligation like I was shown. It’s much more intense than that. It’s hard to hold love to one meaning, because it involves all these intricate parts. Yet, love is one, singular, and universal. The overarching umbrella of it makes you feel good whether it’s love of a friend, love between lovers, or love for family. I define love as an unselfish loyalty and a strong affection. It can be described as an endearment for those we hold close to our heart. Love is freedom and acceptance. It brings joy and life. Love endures hardships and bares the weight for those it holds dear.
Like I said, I’ve been thinking lately about love. I don’t think people know how to love. Today, this ignorance results in people feeling isolated in a world full of potential engagements. Do you ever ask yourself the question, “If I died today who would care or notice?” If you have, you have felt the effects of a world in isolation, always searching for something and stumbling over those who need it too. When will we learn how to give what we need?
Counterfeits of Love
One of the counterfeits of love is sex. I don’t want anyone to be confused, sex is not love on its own. Sex can look like love and act like love. Sex can happen between two people, and they can thoroughly enjoy it without loving each other. Love exists with sex when two people make a commitment with each other physically and spiritually. Sex, then, is more than a physical touch. A soulful bond exists when two people enjoy freedom with another.
Everyone seems to get so excited about Valentine’s day, running around buying candy and flowers for their sweethearts. They put on something sexy for the perfect date. But when the dust of the made-for-marketing holiday settles, can love stand up to hardship? Can you love unconditionally? True love is not diminished when the holiday is gone!
[Taunya is CEO of MAWMedia Group, health coach, nurse, author, and a three-year homeschool veteran. Ask about her health coaching services by connecting on Facebook. She is currently working on two books, the 4th in the Brady Boe series, and Truth–the first in the End Time Saga Trilogy. #ReadTSW at taunyasBnB.com]