MAWMonday Motivators 06/21/2015

Covey_CirclesThis Monday will occur a day after Father’s Day. My #MAWMondayMotivators today, in addition to the well wishes for this US holiday, added some motivation for the week ahead. I was drawn to the discussion of fear, control, faith, purpose, and surrender. The way it all came together was inspiring to me. It ended with a revisiting of Covey’s Influence/Control graphic. The message: You are working harder to gain control, but you must learn to let go and focus on influence. Beyond influence is legacy. In its infancy, legacy must surrender to purpose and faithfully move each moment in the certainty that all things work out for your good. This certainty, however unseen and intangible, is the joy and happiness that you choose each day.

As a father, I know this all too well. I have a son and two daughters. Each day, I have to learn to let go, and influence their development into human beings who are better than me. Each day, I am blessed to enjoy the growth and engagement of that collection of moments. It’s my choice to make every day a Happy Father’s Day.

1. Only fear the Frost.
I attended a session at a conference this past week. The presenter expanded the theory of Fight versus Flight. She stated that the options more holistically included fight, flight, or freeze. It was a brain-expander for me. It makes perfect sense. I had a coaching session later that crystalized it for me. Understand that what you call procrastination is really just a basic fear response. You get angry and combat the situation. You run away from the situation. Or, you sit idle frozen as if preoccupied. Each of these has its downsides, but freezing results in no progress at all. Thaw, and get moving. It doesn’t have to be IT or THE ONE. Get something done. That is the only way.

2. Raise your Awareness. “Fear is not real, danger is real,” Will Smith’s character in After Earth stated. Wake up each morning realizing that you have only a limited amount of time. BUT, not limited to get things done, limited to realize and enjoy each moment. Enjoy a genuine hug. Engage in an authentic conversation. Share your vision. Live your purpose. Progress.

3. Access your Faith.
It is too simple. Believe that when you get there, you will have what you need to take advantage of YOUR opportunity. Believe that you will gain the knowledge and the fortitude required for each moment while utilizing each current moment to its fullest. There is no magical endpoint for your journey. There is only the faith that positive progress yields returns more grand than no progress at all. This belief practiced over time results in happiness and well being–the realization that enjoyment of the journey is the point.

Refuse the inclination to push yourself to do because you are the only one who can make the difference. Change the mindset. Focus on the progress. Own the steps and the consistent contributions to your life and the lives of others. Share in order to educate and relieve suffering. Your reward will be security and the desires you had faith enough not to dwell upon.

4. Keep moving. “Don’t quit,” is thrown around a lot. I am much more comfortable quitting than I was a child. Being called a quitter was one of the supreme insults. It was on par with being called a tattle tale or a chicken. As I have gotten older, I realize that there are important indicators you must listen to. When faced with an unsustainable situation, you must quit your current course of action, and seek to find a more sustainable path. But, this is not the same as giving up. You can respond to new knowledge, correct your approach, turn around, and even ask for directions. You may quit some things because they are untenable, but keep moving.

Covey%20Model.0015. Let go of Control.
Think about it. You don’t need control. Add to that the advice of @IyanlaVanzant. Control is where the fear sleeps. It was Steven Covey who expressed the more sustainable model. You can control yourself, but anything beyond that is influence. Beyond influence you can only be concerned. You need to be systematic, disciplined, consistent, prepared, and a number of other things. Notice that these all apply to you. That is the only sense of control: you and your mindset. Allow the rest, that space beyond you, to work out its own reality.