In my work as a coach, I encounter clients who limit themselves. We all do it. We are genius when it comes to making excuses to obscure our own greatness. The most insidious excuse is what I call false humility. The most dangerous excuse is fear of failure. But, the challenge I recognized recently is the most common excuse: lack of insight. We all see amazing people through media, but few of us watch amazing people in our daily lives. I’m not talking about great people like moms, dads, and guardians. I’m talking about dads who write, raise children, support a wife, rise to prominence in industry, invent shifts, and innovate the culture. We miss the struggle, the tears, and the balance it takes to make it all work. We give credit to lesser examples in our daily lives, but we honestly can’t see what qualities bridge the goodness we see daily and the amazing we see in the media. The result is that we have no pattern for understanding, viewing our own greatness. We have trouble seeing beyond the progression steps to find joy in the path trailing behind us.
This week, I engaged Twitter to provide some tips for seeing your Amazing. I offer lifestyle practices for gaining insight into your greatness. It is by expecting greatness, practicing greatness, and engaging greatness that we glimpse our Amazing.
1. See Yourself as Worthy
Playing small doesn’t serve anyone. Marianne Williamson made that clear. But, it’s not just your action. Many of us have had adversity and even trauma that predisposed us to a view of defeat and victimization. You may resist my diagnosis, but you can’t deny the results you present each day.
The good news, as this tweet says, is that the fact that you have life evidences your worth. No matter what your past experience, action, or perception you have opportunity to create newness in this moment. You can change direction. You can turn up the volume. You can build muscle. You can commit to greater. And, the reward? You deserve it. You will be worthy when it materializes.
— GoalSTAR (@youGoalSTAR) June 28, 2015
2. Believe You Can Faith is vitally important. Why? Because life in some moments will feel rotten. Even if things run smoothly for you, the experience of attempting something new often has learning in the form of failure. It is not experience, but faith that motivates you to keep moving forward. It is only a belief that suggests your eventual triumph. Stoke that spark into a flame. Use that flame to light your way through the dark places.
Men often become what they believe themselves to be. If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it. ~Mahatma Gandhi
— David Vogelsang (@dvogel7921) June 28, 2015
3. Develop Each Day
You are gifted. Gifts are refined through practice. But, gifts alone are not enough to ensure your consistent progress. You will need to develop talents. Think of talents as coins that a great benefactor gives you. Your job is to invest those talents and develop them to leverage more talents and complement your giftedness. Each day, according to the 80-20 rule, 80% of people rest on their laurels. Twenty-percent of people create, innovate, and work with diligence. Make sure that you are one of that 20%. Ensure your progress. Inspire the progress of others.
— Jeremy Scrivens (@JeremyScrivens) June 28, 2015
4. Say What You Feel I learned the value of speaking life into others long ago. It is a cornerstone of my lifestyle coaching. If we are honest, the majority of humans crave authentic interaction. We will even accept interactions that are incomplete, like another’s evaluation of ourselves–if it’s at all favorable. Knowing that, I say what I feel in exhortation even of strangers when I have opportunity. It can be as passive as a smile or as forceful as a, “You are gorgeous!” When it’s genuine, it always elicits gratitude. When it reaches a home in their heart, it always warms yours.
Life is too short to hide your feelings. Don’t be afraid to say what you feel.
— LIL KESH (@lilkesh_YBNL) June 12, 2015
5. Know You Are Wealthy
This begins and ends with what really matters. In the middle, it includes everything that happens. As difficult as it is, I do mean everything. It may sound like horrible, trite dismissal of your feelings, but “That’s life!” The thing is, it’s not horrible, trite dismissal of your feelings. It’s a jolt of reality with an invitation to new insight. Every time your eyes open to a new day, you are fortunate. But, more than that, someone is envious of you.
Realize as I began this post, we don’t have many daily reminders of the process from ordinary to amazing. Each day, you are writing the story, showing the path, climbing the mountains between. Realize that YOU ARE THE EXAMPLE. They are watching you hoping, even in spite of themselves, that they can watch another achieve. It’s time that you saw what they see. It’s time that you take a step back from your daily struggle, and see how far you have walked on the path from ordinary to amazing.
When people say they’d like to be in your shoes, it’s usually after the difficult journey is finished. – Tim Fargo #quote
— Dr. V (@DrV61524705) June 28, 2015